What He Says... About Manscaping

“There's nothing quite like a shorn scrotum... It's breathtaking... I suggest you try it!"
    - Mike Myers as Dr. Evil in Austin Powers: International Man of Mystery

Myself, I'm a big fan of clean-shaven faces and fairly bare chests, but let's see what the guys have to say...

* * *

Damon Suede:
Nope. Nyet. Nein. I find it creepy and off-putting. It’s a bit like generic porno-speak during sex. The moment a guy says, “Fuck that ass.” Or “that’s so hot, stud!” anything resembling chemistry gets flushed down the toilet because I know they’re just aping cliches they picked up from low-budget porn improv in the San Fernando Valley. Homos homogenizing themselves? The blanding and blinding of America. That’s depressing. It depresses me.

Manscaping reflects the same cultural impulse. Plucking and buzzing ourselves like a fucking hedgemaze. We aren’t supposed to be assembly line robots. We don’t come out of a can or a mold. No two treasure trails are the same, and why would anyone want them to be? Some folks are hairy, some aren’t. Whatevs. Homogenizing us just guarantees that nothing is authentic and everyone feeds their own anxieties. In a (very) few cases I’ve seen guys groom themselves in ways that may be more appealing, but mostly manscaping is part of the trend to make ALL people live and look the exact same way even if they don’t and can’t. Look: can it work? Sure. Anything can be hot, but nothing is hotter than authenticity.

Stuart Wakefield:
I’m all for it and practice regularly. Some parts I wax, some I shave, and some I pluck, but generally I just cut it back as opposed to off. I feel better after a grooming session and I think it’s worth taking some time out to care for yourself physically as well as emotionally. I’m not excessively hairy so I don’t see it as a huge job. Not having a partner makes it tricky when it comes to my back but, thankfully, that’s my least hairy part. ;)

D.H. Starr:
I get so turned on by a well manscaped body. Every once in a while I’ll do a full manscape, but it’s a real chore since I have a hairy chest. I don’t have any on my back, maybe a few stragglers, but it’s all in the front, the arms, and legs. I need to invest in a good set of clippers so I can clip. That’s the way I’ll look best. Clip it so it’s not all bushy, then keep my pubes neat and trimmer and my balls and ass smooth as silk. Gosh. In answering this question I feel like I’m giving way too much information.

Thorny Sterling:
Around here, we have hardwood floors and shag carpeting. See, I used to think it was almost required, so I started shaving when I was 18. My husband used to manscape -- he’s pretty hairy everywhere -- but I asked him to stop and now I think there are spots I could probably braid if he’d let me. I just like him furry and he likes not having to fuss with it. Now me? I’m not really hairy anywhere to start with but I like the bare look with some of the clothes I wear and it’s not a lot of work to keep me as smooth as Doug’s silky ass. ;)

Edmond Manning:
I don’t manscape. Should I? Yeah, probably. Early in my relationship with my barber, he yelled at me for not trimming my eyebrows. (He’s a wonderful, grouchy polar bear.) I tried to argue my brows weren’t that bad and he immediately plucked the longest one (ow!) and pulled it between his fingers. He said, “I can floss with this. Sit back and shut up.” He now trims my eyebrows, nose hair, and ear hair. Is that manscaping?

* * *

Your turn! Do you like a nice smooth chest or a thick downy pelt?

The guys will be back Thursday, June 21st with some deeper thoughts on MM romance vs gay romance.

And don't forget, if you have any topics, questions or photos you'd like the guys to tackle, just shoot them my way. We'll make sure you get the credit.

Miss a previous topic? Check them all out here: What He Says Archives